Does my home look like an animal shelter to you!?!

 We live in the country. OK, to be more accurate, we live in the sticks. There are a ton of bonuses to being on the outskirts of civilization, like having a tree at the ready for those potty emergencies when someone else is hoggin’ up the ONE bathroom in a house filled with way more than one bathroom hog.

 Sadly, there are also a few not-so-bonus things about living where we do. For instance, when folks know there’s little speed-gun presence, they tend to drive like bats outta hell on roads with no shoulder to swerve onto, should a stupid animal darts into their path. In the last 8 years, we’ve seen three deer-car collisions, cleaned up more wildlife than you can shake a stick at (that’s country talk for, “a LOT!”) after they failed to win their game of chicken with the cars, and lost more pets than I care to count.

 Word also travels fast out here, meaning EVERYONE knows where that one crazy animal lady calls home and they have little to no qualms about dumping animals in or around her yard. (A few months ago, someone dumped a chicken in our yard. No flippin’ joke!) We’ve sadly witnessed idiots stop in the road in front of our house and toss a half-grown cat out their window. MORE THAN ONCE...Keep on readin'